As a spirited cow mooving through this chaotic world, I decided to take livestock of myself and go on a grand journey around the world. A journey that would take me to places old and new, a journey to discover and most importantly a journey without any bull(s)
In this weekly humour travelogue, expect to see travel tips, misadventures, chewing of cud, food recommendations and reflections as this lone cow navigates her life outside the proverbial cow shed.
Instagram: NoBull_Travel
Monday: #MondayMisadventure at Lau Pa Sat, Singapore
Mondays are for misadventures. Whether its waking up late, grieving the loss of the weekend or feeling the full force of the weekly grind, Mondays were made for misadventure.
With forces of jet lag, language barriers and currency exchange working against you, everyday could be a Monday as you travel. On this day, I will recount misadventures while on the road, in the air or in the barn.
This week’s #MondayMisadventure comes from Singapore.
In Singapore exists the loudest, warmest, busiest, chaoticest, food court in the known universe (Lau Pa Sat). Inside this rotund structure bustling with noodles, broth and paneer tikka, you will find food, drink and the unmistakable aroma of hungry souls. Misadventures are ripe in this swirling vortex of nasi goreng and naan and to truly immerse yourself in the Lau Pa Sat experience, visit during lunch hours on a weekday.
Three cownundrums encowntered:
1. The Choice cownundrum: Easily solved by the age old practice of going to the stall with the longest line in front of it. Wisdom of Cowds right?
2. The Credit Card Cownundrum: Lau Pa Sat doesn’t accept that plastic money we all know and love. This is easily solved by that paper money.
3. The Napkin Cownundrum: Ever thought a packet of tissues could be used to reserve a table? Neither did I. On the far left corner of this picture, behold an average package of napkins assumed to be a pay-it-forward present of a previous table tenant. After 10 minutes of digging into a vast bowl of noodles and broth, I was accosted by a cowncerned fellow patron who told me that she had reserved the table as indicated by the packet of napkins. Multiple apologies ensued and despite her udder displeasure at my behaviour, the patron graciously mooved onto another table. I guess I got choped!
Lesson learned on Misadventure Monday: Don’t have reservations about a local food court experience but look for the napkins!
Tuesday: #Cowaboutthat? at Singapore, Singapore
Today is the day of amazing discovery. Something that makes you sit back in your chair and say “Hmm Cow about that?" This week’s #cowaboutthat? comes from sunny and hair frizzing Singapore.
Singapore is a modern day wonder located only 1.5 degrees away from the equator (that grand divider) and boasts of humidity upwards of what is considered cowly comfortable. As you would expect with any tropical island, its residents would include the whose-who of the world of insects, bugs and other four-legged fellows! (A few family members of mine too!) As I have discowered, Singapore is completely a no-fly zone! No crawlies to creep on you here. No winged pests to swipe away with a flick of your tail (You know who you are). No gnats, no roaches, no mosquitos and other winged foes!
Pictured here are bountiful gardens with a wonderful lack of critter, creep and buzz.
Tropical town with uninvited insects? #cowaboutthat!
Wednesday: #DutyfreeforHumpDay at Kempegwoda International Airport, Bengaluru, India
Wednesday is the proverbial hump in the road for the week. A loss in speed and perhaps mootivation? At #NoBullTravel, we make sure Wednesdays provide just the right about of inspiration, without all the duty.
Presenting #DutyFreeforHumpDay. Every Wednesday, a beautiful curated and considered portrait of an airport duty free store to remind you that the important things of life should be availabull without the burden of local taxes.
Pictured here is the stunning duty free store from Bangalore. Bask in its expansive surroundings, subtle lighting, moderately cheaper chocolates and feel #Bullessed.
Thursday: #4TummyThursday at Woodpine Park, Toronto, Canada
It comes as no surprise that us bovine beauties love a good meal. We are known for our full bodied figures and you know, like I do, that slim is never as good as full fat! We even have four stomachs to accommodate any feast the world can serve up. Tummy #1 is for snacks, appetisers and small bites. Tummy #2 is for rice, pasta and other carby delights. Tummy #3 is for sweets and desserts. Tummy #4 is a standby tummy for extra servings for Tummys 1-3!
On Thursdays, I will give you a glimpse of what has been headed to my 4 tummies through my travels. Bon Apetite for #4TummyThursday!
Pictured here is the belle of the Canadian summer ball Eva’s original chimneys doughnut cones! Sampled at the Toronto food truck festival in Woodbine Park, this sugary treat is a feast to the eyes, taste cuds and Tummy #3. A gracious human is holding a chimney up as I was busy cownsuming mine!
A freshly baked doughnut cone coated in magical cinnamon sugar filled with a swirl of soft serve and topped with a tart strawberry! I think I’m in love! These come in multiple flavours and toppings but quite like my newly purchased adidas sneakers, you cudn't go wrong with the original!
As a tropical cow, I have often wondered why temperate animals across the world endlessly romanticise the summer months! But an afternoon spent slurping this delicious unbelievabull sweet treat in the sun has me cownverted! Summer is for living!
Friday: #TheCowShed at Westin Hotel, Singapore
Fridays are for freedom and some celebratory dairy-based cocktails at the barn. While on the road, I cownsider other things to celebrate and review.
If you’ve ever wondered where the cows go home when they come home, this is your chance to find out!
Today, we discuss #TheCowShed, my chosen accowmadation that I experience as I shuffle through this moortal coil (Who said Cows can’t be mooved by Shakespeare?) Today’s featured #TheCowShed is the @thewestinsingapore(Asia Square). Located in the humourless business district, The Westin wins major points for its no-fuss luxury, moood lighting and minimal atmosphere. Come here for the central location, but stay for the views, the interesting tea cups and the ease of service!
The #NoBullTravel review featuring what I liked (The Moo) and What I didn’t (The Beef) •
The Moo
* Location, Location, Location: A walk, skip and gentle stroll away from Marina Bay Sands, Gardens by the bay and quick moober ride away from the hot spots and restaurants!
* No Fuss, No Muss: Clean, functional and exactly what you paid for! (Not at a discownt mind you!) •
The Beef
* Checkin Counters: How many documents, head nods and keyboard strokes does it take to check you into the Westin? Turn out an unbelievabull amount! It takes 15 seconds for them to charge you if you pick up something from the minibar, but a good 20 minutes of your life to check you in? Cowmon! * Wifi: I find places with 5 step login procedures to connect to Wifi absolutely unacceptabull! The modern cow wants to jump onto the wifi quicker than what it takes to get over the moon! Don’t troubull your weary world travellers, we need to check them Instagram likes! A simple Wifi login always wins brownie cow points!
Final Recowmendation: Yes for a short visit! More suited to business cows than #NoBullTravellers however!
Saturday: #WeekendMilkTip at Singapore
For this edition of the #weekendmilktip we go to Singapore in Asia.
Temptation is strong to follow the advice of others before you, when you travel. But in those earlier hoofsteps, lies grave danger. Old zen saying: The insider tip (preferably dairy) of a rare traveller is more powerful than the cliched wisdom of a thousand tourists. While you tell others of your plan to visit this island wonder, watch how they emphatically recommend Sentosa island, Orchard Street and worst of all, Clark Quay on a Friday night. Tread carefully my bovine brethren! While these arent the worst places to be, a local wouldn't be caught slaughtered here.
Tip: Ditch the tourist traps and head on over to the fowl named Chicken Up on Tanjong Padar road for a lowcowl experience. Grab 2-5 of your closest acowtainces and sit down for a watermelon soju. As a tropical cow, nothing pleases me more than the use of tropical fruits for the cowllective inebriation of others. Watch with amazement as an entire bottle of Soju is emptied into the waiting fruity arms of a large eager watermelon. Ladel out this fruity delight in cups to enjoy the evening, as a local should. Drink to your collective healths, spirits and moood fortune.
Sunday: #DayofGraze at Toronto, Canada
Today is the day of graze.
Sunday is the day to relax, reflect and graze on the week that has gone by and the week that is fast approaching. Perhaps you graze on a boozy brunch or perhaps you graze on your weekly To-Do list. Since you're wondering, I usually spend my Sundays in an open meadow munching on some organic non-gmo free-range hay.
On this day of sungraze, here's reminding you to sit down in the sun, slow down just a little bit and think about where you are.
That's how we graze in Toronto.